Joyous Expansion Podcast Transcript Heather Breedlove – How to Shine Your Bright

[00:00:00.300] – Brett Dupree

Hello, Heather, and welcome to my podcast. Good morning.

[00:00:03.790] – Heather Breedlove

Good morning. So excited to be here.

[00:00:06.570] – Brett Dupree

Can you please give the listeners a brief introduction to who you are?

[00:00:10.230] – Heather Breedlove

Absolutely. So my name is Heather Breedlove and I founded really a movement named Shine Your Bright. And a little bit about where that came from and who I am is I grew up small-town America, white picket fences, really had all of my goals and dreams set up for my life and started going. I left. It was Pelham, Georgia, left there when I was 18, landed at the University of Georgia, graduated, went on to a corporate career, really started working my checklist, the marriage, the job.

[00:00:47.040] – Heather Breedlove

And as I checked that off, I started turning around and saying, well, a couple of things happened. It was taking a lot of effort to keep it all together. And I didn’t necessarily really be present and true with who I wanted to be. I was living that checklist that we all thought we wanted. Growing up. And then second, when something didn’t happen on that checklist, how did I navigate and still be happy with life knowing it wasn’t going to be what I wanted?

[00:01:17.820] – Heather Breedlove

I can expand a little and just hop into some of that. Like, for instance, also like, for instance, marriage.

[00:01:26.280] – Heather Breedlove

Love my husband so dearly. He’s my life. Love and partner met him at 19. We got married at twenty-five. But I didn’t realize marriage could be hard. We went through a lot of ups and downs. I thought marriage was really just a mirror of the marriage. My parents had and he thought the same and clearly, they didn’t have the same marriages. So we were going through life really with two different perceptions. And until we started learning about ourselves and how to have our own marriage, it was kind of surface level.

[00:01:59.880] – Heather Breedlove

Fortunately, we doubled down on learning about ourselves. He did some major life changes. I had to learn to grow with him and we found our own way. You couple that when it turned out right after we got married. My dad was diagnosed with melanoma. We got married in June. Great wedding. He was gone by Thanksgiving and we had no idea he was even sick when we got married. So we had to navigate that and then knowing that he wouldn’t be around for most of my married life.

[00:02:30.720] – Heather Breedlove

Second, we found out kids weren’t really an option for us. So that fits very much in the happily ever after when you’re growing up. But now, today, we found a life that we love and are flourishing. Without children, that’s an adjustment. Right. And that’s a little bit of a shift to double back down on who you are and how to be happy.

[00:02:50.760] – Brett Dupree

How was it like learning that you couldn’t have kids

[00:02:54.250] – Heather Breedlove

a little about to me no, failures are not an option. I typically will just go in and manhandle the situation to make it happen. What I ended up doing is it got to the point of trying to force children in our lives was really causing a lot of internal conflict with both Tom and I. And what I was able to kind of let it go and say, OK, this is where I am.

[00:03:21.870] – Heather Breedlove

What does the universe has planned for me? I started realizing I should ask myself why I wanted children and I was sitting. We’ve got this little lake cabin, which has just been a joy to have, especially right now they’re in quarantine. But we had this little lake cabin. I was sitting out there one morning and really started asking, well, why do I want children? And I remember it like it was yesterday. I saw just some bubbles blowing across the air with a kid next door.

[00:03:52.440] – Heather Breedlove

And it was really the joy of the play and having and keeping that inner child for myself and not necessarily the raising of a child. I wanted that laugh out loud laughter in that joy of finding new experiences. And you see that. And that’s easy to see in children. And so what I was able to do then is I took that little experience and shifted it into learning about myself. And that’s how Shine Your Bright was born in that scene, that little bit of extraordinary and just an ordinary bottle of bubbles. I developed a journal about ordinary things. Finding the magic in them and being able to journal around them.

[00:04:40.030] – Brett Dupree

Were you always somebody who was in the self-inquiry?

[00:04:43.220] – Heather Breedlove

No. And I think that was a lot of my story are we and I are going to add a little about my husband here because we’ve walked this path together where I grew up with white picket fences. He wasn’t necessarily in the same environment. His was a little more volatile and what we didn’t understand is why we’re trying to keep this life together and keep climbing that corporate ladder. Why it’s so difficult. And he went and started learning about himself. That’s when it opens a whole new door.

[00:05:16.500] – Heather Breedlove

And I don’t know how much any of the listeners participate that. But when you start really getting to know yourself again or even for the first time, it can be scary. And it’s incredible just to start admitting to yourself that you’re not happy, you’re just putting on a face for everyone. So when he doubled down and started learning about himself, that opened to hold the door for me. And that’s when I probably started myself. Inquiry, too.

[00:05:42.880] – Brett Dupree

Well, that’s so cool. I’ve heard that go both ways. Go to the other person taking on that self-responsibility of looking themselves or just breaking up the marriage entirely.

[00:05:53.130] – Heather Breedlove

Well, we have this joke in our marriage that it’s actually pretty serious. We kind of joke around that. We’ve been married and divorced five times. We just keep marrying each other. I think the reason we’ve been so successful about that is that we do know that we want to grow and we want to be all that we can be and we want to touch as many lives as possible. It can be hard in that growth is really that tension that you’re blossoming out of. Some people, you get to the point where you just can’t find your way back.

[00:06:25.530] – Brett Dupree

So what’s it like growing with a partner in this situation?

[00:06:29.340] – Heather Breedlove

Oh, well, at first it was super. And I think we’re about probably seven or eight years on this path before we really started shifting. We have conversations. I also like to say we don’t say no to each other. So if he has a hope and a dream, I’d say no. Like to put it out there. Sometimes he walked away from a corporate job. He was a shareholder of super large accounting firm in the Southeast.

[00:06:54.540] – Heather Breedlove

Well, he walked away. Called me on Valentine’s Day. One day I was driving to my office and he goes, today’s the day I’m going to leave. Well, I guess for a minute, because his salary was double mine. And we’re just going to walk away from it so he can go pursue his hopes and his dreams. Well, that could be scary, because then you’ve got your mortgage, you’ve got your car payments, and you’ve got to really shift.

[00:07:18.360] – Heather Breedlove

I had to shift my life to help him go live life which now I know he was meant to live. I would say it’s certainly scary to do. And then once we take that leap, we talk our way through it. We started understanding. He’ll make a decision instantaneously. I will take 24 hours and think about it and really feel good about my decision. And once we started learning how the other would navigate, we’re just able to grow.

[00:07:46.770] – Heather Breedlove

And as we keep taking those leaps of faith and doing it together, the bond gets stronger and stronger and stronger.

[00:07:54.120] – Brett Dupree

That’s really cool. It’s I think it’s something special being able to grow with another person, having that type of relationship. So it’s always nice to hear about that.

[00:08:02.100] – Heather Breedlove

Yeah, totally.

[00:08:03.510] – Brett Dupree

And you got into self-inquiry and wanting to change your life. How was that process?

[00:08:11.280] – Heather Breedlove

So for me, I would say I didn’t even realize that I wanted to get into self-inquiry. And one of our big pivot points when it was about to just all blow open and we were at that point where we were going to leave, go start separate lives. Fortunately, Tommy went to a place in Tennessee called On-Site, and it was a living centered program where he spent seven days really learning about himself and tools to learn about yourself. It was such an experience for him, I went.

[00:08:43.920] – Heather Breedlove

All of a sudden he had this huge spark of self-growth and it left me kind of floundering in trying to figure out I mean, it yanks the rug out from under you. So I went and I remember driving up there and I was like, I could go to the beach and he would never know. I didn’t show up. But I ended up going and they had this one afternoon, they did horse therapy. It was really interesting to watch how different people interacted with their horses.

[00:09:11.970] – Heather Breedlove

Some people would get angry and yell at the horse, which the horse shuts down and there’s no forward movement there. Some people were very timid. In which case, like your horse can clearly be an alpha. What happened for me in that afternoon was somehow that horse and I connected and we were in a partnership. Tommy and I had not necessarily been on a stable partnership level really up until that point in our marriage. But what I felt was when I realized it was an equally balanced relationship, even if it was with the horse, I had this glow inside of me that just started shining and like bursting and growing.

[00:09:53.970] – Heather Breedlove

And it was happiness. But I had not felt that happiness in so long. It was almost overwhelming. That was the first time in granted I didn’t go all in and start learning about myself and really just open up. But what happened is I felt it. I knew what it was like. And I knew if I didn’t get back to that happy, there would always be a piece of me missing.

[00:10:19.600] – Brett Dupree

What got you into wanting to take this experience and actually write a book. Share it with others.

[00:10:25.510] – Heather Breedlove

As Tommy was growing, I was growing. It just came to me one day. And I was I love seeing people happy. And that goes right back to the story about the children, the joy in living your best life, not having people holding you back. The pressure of going through that checklist. What I wanted to do was tell people it’s OK to abandon your checklist. It’s OK to live your hopes and your dreams.

[00:10:52.030] – Heather Breedlove

And it doesn’t have to be all about your career and all about your marriage and all about your children. And those are pieces of it. But who are you? And it was hard for me to start learning who I was again. And that’s why I put the journal together because it takes small steps. I mean, some of us that have been closed up, you might not even know what your favorite food is at a restaurant because you haven’t thought through that.

[00:11:16.300] – Heather Breedlove

The journal and the self-help piece is really a platform to start to learn who you are again. And we call it a reintroduction to yourself. And it’s been such a great experience that we’re even doing a conference in September just for people that want to get out and start to learn about themselves again and want that little push. I have no idea where to start building your confidence.

[00:11:40.810] – Brett Dupree

When it comes to writing your book. What are some of the trials and tribulations in writing it?

[00:11:46.750] – Heather Breedlove

The consistent movement forward and stepping out of my comfort zone to just go do it? Because what you are is you’re putting yourself out there really to be judged? Or what if it’s not a success? What if its people don’t like it? I think that was my biggest thing to overcome because you just don’t know it’s being vulnerable to a whole world of people.

[00:12:10.870] – Brett Dupree

As someone who wrote a book, I know how vulnerable that can be.

[00:12:15.030] – Heather Breedlove

I was going to ask you about that because it’s a piece of your soul that you put out to the universe. But there is this commonality, right? We’re all connected in some way. And we all have our problems. We all have our fears. We all have excitement. And if we could just all support each other through that, the world is so much more meaningful than trying to compete. I remember I was sitting at dinner with a couple of my friends one night.

[00:12:38.940] – Heather Breedlove

I mean, I treasure these two women as probably my best friends in life. And one of them just broke down. And she said, How are you guys keeping your marriages together? Everybody. So they look like. Their marriages are great. Mine’s falling apart. I don’t think we’re gonna make it. And it hit me in that instance. I’m like, how sad is it that my best friend has been struggling with her marriage for years? And she hits this breaking point before she ever tells me about it.

[00:13:07.480] – Heather Breedlove

And that just goes to how many of our relationships are surface level and not talking about the real things going on in our lives.

[00:13:15.280] – Brett Dupree

Yeah, that can lead to an isolation feeling. I think one of the best parts of my own personal growth is learning that none of my pain, that none of my trauma, nothing I’ve ever experienced is special. There’s a lot of people out there who experience the same thing and learning from other people, hearing other people’s story has been very helpful for me to grow in that situation.

[00:13:36.100] – Heather Breedlove

Well, and just knowing that you’re not alone. I even say I kind of throw this out there because women can be they can be tough growing up and there can be a big jealousy component. What I’ve found, though, is so many of us are so good at different things with some of us are nurturers. Some of us go out and find new experiences. Some of us are really into beauty. And I’ve found that rather than being jealous or in being what someone is good at is I’ve surrounded myself with a circle of friends that if I want to go travel and go to a great new place, I know which friends are going to say, hey, this is what I want to do. I know if I need to be just on a couch and being taken care of, I know which friends going to call me over and make me hot cocoa and surrounding yourself and finding your inner community for that. It’s such a strong support group.

[00:14:30.700] – Brett Dupree

Tell our listeners about your book. What exactly is it about?

[00:14:35.380] – Heather Breedlove

It’s got a journal. I’ve got my story upfront. Just sharing my path, how I got to where I was, and what I shifted to do this book. And really, it’s got open white space for you to write. So on every page is an ordinary, everyday picture. And like, for instance, I’ve got a clock on one page. And then I’ve got some prompts around anticipation schedules, tick-tock. And then some questions you can think through.

[00:15:03.370] – Heather Breedlove

Like, how do you take time for yourself when this time slows down for you or if you had time, what would you do? People that have used it just taking time, flipping through, finding a page to write with, and have that in a reflection whether they start their day with. Whether they end their day with it. I’ve heard a lot about sitting in the carpool lines at school, even though that’s not happening these days. But really just that self-reflection of that book. And it’s taking ordinary and hopefully finding some extraordinary with who you are and how you relate to those images.

[00:15:37.280] – Brett Dupree

What’s been the coolest part about writing your book?

[00:15:40.540] – Heather Breedlove

The creativity and the self-expression and seeing one when the impact it makes in people’s lives and getting the emails and the text messages saying, hey, I was going through this transition in life. The one I just heard from last week was from college into a career and super intimidated by that shift and taking the shine your bright journal and working through it and giving her self a little bit of confidence each and every day and knowing who she is and really establishing those core values so that as we make choices in the future, we know which values to ask ourselves, is this in alignment with who I am and who I want to be? So I think it’s the people’s impact that’s been hands down. The coolest experience.

[00:16:26.710] – Brett Dupree

There’s something special about impacting people. So what are some of the impacts that you have received?

[00:16:34.330] – Heather Breedlove

I’ve had let’s see. We’ve had someone who had a child. She was not it was a big adjustment having the child. And she told me she was able to take the journal and it would just give her a piece of her day back to herself to kind of start to work through that process. One of the other cool things is I had a mom and daughter both with their journals, and they would do it together and sit and talk about what page they picked and what they had written on that day at dinner that night. Just some really super cool stories and sharing around that.

[00:17:10.670] – Brett Dupree

You seem to tour with your book and dor book signings. How has that been for you?

[00:17:15.670] – Heather Breedlove

You know, it’s been wonderful to meet people. One of the things that I absolutely love doing is traveling, experiencing. And it’s easy for me. We kind of a joke in our marriage. Tommy is definitely the people person and I can be quieter. But what’s this is done is really helped to me make connections and really intimate connections with people

[00:17:39.870] – Brett Dupree

Looking you over your website seems like you have your own conference, the Shine Your Bright Conference.

[00:17:43.360] – Heather Breedlove

I do. It’s been super exciting to plan to go back. I mean, I grew gosh from an early age. I’d say back when I was twenty-five, I started doing an annual trip with all the women in my family and planning it and making sure that we would do something out of the ordinary every year. One year we did parasailing. One year we, oh gosh, to Wimoweh to go to a show. What happened is since we’ve been doing those for 17 years and seeing the energy and the happiness and laughter around doing things that we wouldn’t normally do, it was such an easy shift to take it from 13 women and my family to open it up to the Shine Your Bright community. And we’re doing a retreat in September at Stone Mountain and got some great which is just outside of Atlanta. It’s a beautiful, beautiful spot on a lake with a lot of outdoor trails and whatnot. Super excited to have this conference. The people that are involved that are gonna be bringing some of their content, even topics like how do you start to get out of your comfort zone? Another big thing we talk about is when you know you need to make a change and everyone around you is saying, it’s time, it’s time, it’s time.

[00:19:03.040] – Heather Breedlove

But what I call it is living in the gray, living in that gray area where, you know, you want to make a change, but you’re not quite there and saying it’s okay to live in that space. But really, what steps can I take to make baby steps to start to get out of it rather than just a mass? This is my new life. So, yeah, we’ve got some exciting topics and just a weekend full of fun.

[00:19:26.640] – Brett Dupree

This is your first conference you’re putting on, right?

[00:19:28.510] – Heather Breedlove

It is. It is. And of course, we had to reschedule given all of the COVID transitions in life. But I think it’s just going to work out. It’s a beautiful time of the year outside of Atlanta, Georgia, where you’re starting to get into fall and you can just feel it in the air. I’m just trusting that it’s working out the best way possible.

[00:19:47.600] – Brett Dupree

It even has a laser light show

[00:19:49.800] – Heather Breedlove

It. It does. They do. It’s this huge and it’s Stone Mountain, but it’s this huge mountain that’s completely made out of stone. They do a laser light show at night which talks about Shine Your Bright. I mean, just to see the light going through. And it’s so fun. And it’s one of just those staples that you do if you’re in Atlanta.

[00:20:12.850] – Brett Dupree

So we are coming to the end of our time together. One thing I like to ask my guests, do a one minute of motivation. You can imagine this as if you have a time machine and you going back to your eight-year-old self and you want to give it everything you need to know to live a happy, joyful life. But unfortunately, you have a minute into your pop, back into the future, or you can think of it as condensing your entire life’s mission into a minute. So are you ready?

[00:20:34.620] – Heather Breedlove

Oh, let’s do it.

[00:20:35.760] – Brett Dupree

Awesome. Let’s go.

[00:20:37.000] – Heather Breedlove

Let’s go. You are a special person. You shine. You have everything you need in life to have the life that you dream of. You can take little steps. You can take big steps. Just keep going. And we’re here to support, you know, your dreams and your life are going to be everything you want. I know I don’t get to a minute, but I’ll tell you, my dog liked that because his tails wagging right now.

[00:21:00.850] – Heather Breedlove

Yes. Thank you so much. This has been incredible.

[00:21:05.410] – Brett Dupree

Thank you so much for being on my podcast. I very much enjoyed listening to your journey about how you got started trying to live a life of societal checklists. I mean, that house. I need a car. I need some children. I knew that white picket fence and recognizing the fact that maybe that just isn’t for you. And then there’s something more. And to recognize the fact of what your partner was going through into self-inquiry and stepping into that light with him and shining out and recognizing the benefit of personal development and self-growth to not only do the self-inquiry work but also to help other people shine their life and live their best lives through this just very special. So thank you so much for everything that you do for this planet. And thank you for coming on my podcast.

[00:21:53.380] – Heather Breedlove

Thank you so very much. It was an absolute pleasure to be here today.

[00:21:57.610] – Brett Dupree

May your day be special.

Joyous Expansion Podcast Transcript W.T. Hamilton, Mindset Coach, and Author – How The Mindset For Success Can Work For You!

Brett Dupree

Hello, W.T., and welcome to my podcast.

WT Hamilton

Hey, Brett, great to be here.

Brett Dupree

It’s great to have you. So, I take it you’re an author?

WT Hamilton

Yeah, I’ve been known to write a book or two in my spare time.

Brett Dupree

What got you interested in writing?

WT Hamilton

Initially I was learning about the law of attraction. A lot of it wasn’t really jiving for me. So I started journaling, writing things that I was learning that things that were working and then things that weren’t working.

WT Hamilton

Basically, that was going to be something I could give my kids to give them a jumpstart. And then my mom was writing as well. And she said she was going to write a book about her experiences. And I told her about stuff that I wrote and turned out that became our first book. And that led me to doing all the different types of writing that I’m doing now.

Brett Dupree

Oh, interesting. What about the law of Attraction? Wasn’t working for you.

WT Hamilton

Was it too spiritual for me and not enough logic? I was kind of looking at it from because I make a practical, logical type of person and kind of skeptical as well. So, I had to really see how does it work? What’s the real method behind the secret type of the flashy stuff? What how does it really work? How can I really take something, focus on it and put action to it so I can achieve whatever it is I’m trying to achieve?

Brett Dupree

You’re not a big believer in sending your intention onto universe and the universe, rearranging everything it can to hand it to you?

WT Hamilton

No, I know that’s what happens. But my part is I don’t like to just to sit back. I like to have some action because of how I look at it, as if I could just think everything and it just kind of magically works out for me. I’m going to be bored. I want to feel like I’m doing something as well. So, I really look at it as how do I use it to really keep me focused on the goal that I said that I wanted to do that. I can have daily actions, weekly actions, monthly actions to get me there.

Brett Dupree

So, I’m curious, what got you interested into the law of attraction, into personal development?

WT Hamilton

What happened was I was working this job I really loved. Everything was great. I had a good high position in that job, just enjoyed it, had a lot of fun. And then the stock market crash in 2009. Company went bankrupt. So, then I got hired on through an investment firm that took it over. And they hired some consultants and they hired me to help them build it back up. But instead of doing the job I was doing, which was production manager and planning and hiring and firing and training people.

WT Hamilton

I had to start doing sales, which I didn’t have any experience in. And so, I had to learn how to do sales. And as I was learning how to do sales, some of the things that they were doing, I just didn’t feel comfortable with. It wasn’t I didn’t like the way I was making my money. I didn’t like the things that I had to say because, you know, a lot of times I felt like I had to lie to people to get them to work with us or do whatever because of the way that the new place managed.

WT Hamilton

It was completely different from how we used to do things. I started to feel like I need to find a better way to do things in a better ethical code for myself. And then at that time, my mom had seen the movie The Secret. And so, she turned me on to that.

Brett Dupree

Did you jump into the secret and then research more about the law of attraction?

WT Hamilton

Because the secret is more like a commercial for the law of attraction. It didn’t really show us how. It just told us what you could do, but not how to make it work. So, when we started researching, we found this book called The Master Key, and it was a crazy book for me. It was written like 100 years ago. And in a language that they talked in the 100 years ago, I had a hard time resonating with it.

WT Hamilton

And so that forced me to really look at, you know, why is it that I’m having such a hard time to understand this stuff and other people? It seems to just click. So that’s where I started to really start trying to see what could I do? Like what cool. Can I set and see if that works? And I was finding little things were easy and they would manifest. But the big things were a more of a struggle.

Brett Dupree

So basically, you’re saying you were able to get the parking space but not the dream job. Exactly.

WT Hamilton

Yeah. Little things were working out great. Yeah. Anything that big. And I understand now why. But at that time, it was a kind of a struggle to really understand what their hurdles were and how to get around them.

Brett Dupree

Obviously leads to my next questions. What were the hurdles?

WT Hamilton

A lot of their hurdles really was in believing that you can have it that you deserve it and you’re worthy of it. LA Times, I would say to myself, yeah, this is what I want is what I want to have happen, but then believe that I deserve it. And I didn’t believe I was worthy of it. So it was like a fantasy is like a wish. But for me to be able to make that transition also meant that I had to look at myself and see.

WT Hamilton

So, if I want to make one hundred thousand dollars a year and I’m making fifty thousand dollars, what is it I got to do to get to that one thousand dollar level? And then what I found was a lot of it was mindset was my skills, my habits. They all had to change. I had to do some work to get those to change. And that part they’d already tell you in the law of attraction because it’s not as sexy as just saying, hey, just focus on things and see affirmations and it’ll happen for you.

Brett Dupree

So, what changes in your life did you notice once you start removing these hurdles?

WT Hamilton

The big thing for me was really building up confidence and then learning how to give. Myself, permission to do things instead of waiting for people to give me permission. At one point when I was working for that other company. They weren’t paying me enough money. They weren’t paying me as much money as I was making before the company went bankrupt. And they were always promising they were going to look after us after things picked up. But every time things would pick up, when it was getting better and better, they were still holding us back.

WT Hamilton

I accepted that for a long time until the one year. It was just before Christmas. And I was looking at my money and I was realizing that I don’t have enough money to buy my kids the presents that they wanted. I started to feel really like a failure, not because I couldn’t buy them the presents, but because I allowed someone else to tell me what I was worth and how high I could go and what I could have. And that’s when I made that switch and realized I got to take charge and responsible for where I am at, not point fingers at other people and learn how to fix it.

WT Hamilton

And the only way that I could fix it was to give myself permission to move forward and permission to take chances and learn and grow.

Brett Dupree

What changes in your life, did you see after you did that?

WT Hamilton

Immediately, once I started focusing on that mindset. I started finding solutions to my problems instead of excuses and reasons for my problems. Once I was able to start finding solutions, that was opening up the doors. And as that happened, I start feeling more confident, believing more in power, of focusing on what I want and always looking forward instead of looking back and complaining.

Brett Dupree

What actual changes that you see in your life?

WT Hamilton

So, the actual change is one of the things I was able to find a better opportunity. So, I was able to leave that company basically got a job with this other company. And because of how things were structured, I ended up being a consultant for them, which really opened a whole new world of independence and being able to work from phone and making my own hours. And it was really from taking that leap of faith of saying I’m worthy of more and I can do more.

WT Hamilton

And so, I went and I started looking for exactly what I was, the situation and the circumstances that were going to work the best from myself.

Brett Dupree

What got you into wanting to share your story and help other people through stories?

WT Hamilton

What I found was with a lot of different things in my personal development. It’s all about really resonating, connecting with people that have been through it and have figured out different little tricks and techniques. When I was listening to other people, some of them I couldn’t connect with and resonate with, and then there’d be the odd person, the odd story that here that would just a light bulb would go off. So I know that is very important for everybody, no matter who you are or what you’re going through to share your story, because someone is going to be really be able to relate to exactly what you’re talking about or what you’ve been through.

WT Hamilton

And if you don’t tell that story, that person might never get over that hump because that your voice might be the only voice that they’re really going to be able to click with to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Brett Dupree

So, what got you into running to write it into a story or a parable rather than telling your story?

WT Hamilton

As I started writing the one chapter, books are reading different things of experiences. What I went through, I was finding that because I had done Toastmasters as well as find that there’s a power in telling a story as a story, that you remember it more when it’s a story than when it’s just here’s the facts. So having been able to build mind pictures, build atmosphere and make a story memorable, have some memorable sentences in the way that you structure things found that was so much more effective, and they kind of start to fall in love with being able to take somebody on that journey.

Brett Dupree

What has been like promoting your book?

WT Hamilton

Promoting the book is it’s been incredibly challenging because two reasons. One, because a one-chapter book. Something different. So, I always have to explain to people what a one-chapter book is and know why that’s cool and the benefits of it. And then just being able to get out there and got to be the cheerleader for your own product, to be the cheerleader for your own book, whatever it is that you’re doing.

WT Hamilton

And you must do that every single day. And you must do that this month, next month, the month after. It’s not like when you hire someone to do a campaign for you. Maybe they run a two-week campaign or a three-week campaign. This is something you’ve got to do 24/7, and there’s really no end to it.

Brett Dupree

Are you finding that your techniques have helped you through this because of me able to focus?

WT Hamilton

What happens is I’m able to set small goals and big goals, and you’ll always find that I have something that I’m looking forward to, something I’m working toward and doing to reach more people and to really just help more people with solutions and with finding how they can do the things that I’m doing as well.

Brett Dupree

What have you like most about being an author?

WT Hamilton

What I like the most, really, it is launching the books. Being able to talk to people and get the feedback from them on what they liked and even what they don’t like, so they can tweak it for the next one. But it’s really that interaction with people and the feedback. And just you once you’ve written a book and you’re able to get it out there, you start to meet a lot of cool people and you are finding a lot of likeminded people that. Kind of unexpectedly.

Brett Dupree

That’s cool, I’ve noticed that, too. My podcasts. Also, something I noticed that this around podcast, Eighty five and 80 interviews just going through this process has been a huge personal growth process for me. Stepping into being the role of a podcast was promoting all the fun stuff. So as an author going through the promotions, how have you grown as a person?

WT Hamilton

So I’m constantly growing because I am constantly learning how to. I want to be authentic the way that I am. I like to have a lot of fun. I like to joke around. But also, I’m learning that you have to have a certain amount of professionalism for people to take you seriously. So, it’s trying to find that blend. I’m always kind of working on that blend of being true to who I am, but also presenting it in a way that people are going to understand how that can benefit them.

WT Hamilton

It’s a real dance, a real kind of balance or battle

Brett Dupree

To be authentic as well and in your marketing, you can also be very vulnerable. Have you noticed that and how you push through it if that’s been an issue?

WT Hamilton

When I was first doing it, I was trying to I think I was trying to be too professional to cookie cutter. And it wasn’t till I was really started to talk about some of the struggles that I’ve been through and just being as relatable and honest as a can be. That’s when things really started to take off. But it’s still hard for me because I’m still kind of guarded with how much I want to talk about, especially when it comes to things like I don’t call them failures, I call them setbacks.

WT Hamilton

But when you do have setbacks and you have struggles, sometimes it’s hard to talk about the big struggles that you go through. I try to get through that and share that because I know it helps people. Yes, people want to see that you can be successful, but they also have to understand that it’s work and it’s a challenge. And you’re going to have risks since the more risk you take, the more chances you have to have setbacks and then have to figure out what you’re going to do and try again.

Brett Dupree

That’s one thing I noticed when I was promoting myself as a coach and as a podcast host, much at the beginning of trying to create this aura of success. But I noticed that just almost made everything feel like a burden because I had to work so hard keeping up. I don’t know a lie, but almost a lie of omission.

WT Hamilton

I know at one point, I think maybe a few years ago, that was more of things that if you’re working with a mentor or a coach, they would push you into. But I think that philosophy has gone away, and people are just really trying to be as vulnerable and honest and open as they can about what they’re doing and where they’re at and where they’re trying to go.

Brett Dupree

And I think too many people are renting Lamborghinis and hiring hot chicks and to shoot in those YouTube videos back in the day.

WT Hamilton

Yeah, exactly.

Brett Dupree

What kind of reception have you gained from your book?

WT Hamilton

It’s been kind of a lot of different reception. So sometimes, like when I meet people that don’t know me at all, haven’t seen me on social media or anything, and I tell them that I’ve done like a one chapter book where the whole book is just one chapter along solving one business problem at a time. They’ll say, Oh, that’s cool idea. That sounds interesting with their words, but with their face, they’re giving me a look of know, are you crazy, man?

WT Hamilton

Or what do you what do you think? And this is the craziest thing I’ve ever heard. So, I have that. But then on the flip side of it, I get reviews and get a lot of great reviews of the latest book. The Harsh Truth. I won an award for it’s been a real rollercoaster of reception. Some people are really into it. Get it right away. Other people not sure and have to kind of do a little bit of work to even just get them me even interested in hearing about it.

WT Hamilton

But it’s all part of when you’re doing something, you’re being authentic and you’re really focused on helping a small group of people, then you’re not going to resonate with everybody, but you’re going to resonate with the right people. And I think if you can get that mindset that you don’t have to please everybody, just the people that really need what you’re selling or what you’re sharing, then it’s OK. You can be OK with I can post a video and it only gets 20 views. I’m fine with I can post a video. Only extreme views.

Brett Dupree

I’m fine with that even fine if you get one view and one comment. That’s mean.

WT Hamilton

Yes. So, what I find is it depends on what the comment is. So, if it’s constructive, they’re telling me even if it’s mean, but if it has some constructive ism in it. Then I can take from it that, OK, this person is telling me if I did this differently, next time I’ll make a better video or write a better book. But if it’s just they’re just being mean just to be mean. I just kind of ignore it.

WT Hamilton

But the hard part is to be able take the emotions out of any criticism and they really look at what they’re saying and seeing if you can find the constructive criticism in there, because the constructive criticism is always free advice of I would’ve liked your book better if he had done this.

Brett Dupree

A lot of people out there who want to write a book, what advice would you give them?

WT Hamilton

So, the biggest advice, I think, is just not worrying too much about how good your book is going to be, because the more you write, the better you’re going to get at it. It’s the same as the more that you do anything in life, the better you’re going to get at it. But you’re never going to get good at it if you don’t do the first one. I would say just write the first book. I wouldn’t go crazy on spending tons of money on it, but I would just get.

WT Hamilton

That first book out there. Get some feedback and then you can tweak it. You can do second editions in third editions and the more that you write, the more you’ll learn what your style is and how you want to present how you want your whole book to flow. And you start to get better at writing and telling your story. But I know a lot of people are afraid to even do the first one because you get judged. They once the book is out there, it’s out there forever and that can be very scary for people.

Brett Dupree

One of the favorite advices I’ve ever heard, I believe, is from the co-founder from NLP listening to one of his books is the book you released is 100 percent better than the book. You don’t.

WT Hamilton

Yeah, that’s true. That’s true. And the thing is, I mean, you probably have a good story. It might not be the greatest story ever written, but it’s probably a good story and can be tweaked. And if you’re open to it, you can get an editor and the editor will help you and they’ll make some changes. Some of the changes you may not like, but they’ll help you with it. If so, it just is really all about how much you want to invest in your first book. But I think people get too bogged down in trying to make it perfect and then it never gets past their final draft.

Brett Dupree

Do you have any success stories or like awesome interviews of how your book changed somebody and helped somebody?

WT Hamilton

Because I have a lot of techniques and advice in the books. So, I was talking to one of my friends and I had read the book, The Luckypreneur. It’s really about network marketing. And so, and she said that once she read, because in it I talk about how it basically like what we’ve just talked about, how to deal with criticism and how to look at success. So she said once she read that, it helped her to really go out there and be fearless in how she approaches people and not worry so much about, because a lot of times she was worried about what people are going to think or what they’re going to say or how they’re going to react to her.

WT Hamilton

That book was able to help her to see that you can just go out there and be yourself and have fun and connect with people in a genuine way instead of always trying to get out there and just hand out your business card. And so, as she read through that and she started practicing that, she said it really made a big impact on how she was able to network more successfully.

Brett Dupree

That’s very cool. We’re coming to the end of our time together. And one thing I like to ask my guests is to do a one minute of motivation. You can think of this as if you have a time machine and you going back in time to your eight year old self and you want to convey the information you need to live a happy and joyful life. But unfortunately, your plopped back into the future in one minute, or you can think of it as events in your entire life message your entire life purpose into a minute.

Brett Dupree

So, you’re ready.

WT Hamilton

Okay. Well, the thing that I would tell myself is just believe in yourself more than you believe in a opinion of other people, because the more that you can see yourself being successful, the more successful you’re going to be. And you’re going to have some hard times where nobody is going to care what you’re doing and you’re going to feel like you’re completely on your own because you’re never on your own, because as long as you have yourself, you have more than enough to strive and get to where you want to get to.

WT Hamilton

You just must keep on going. And it is all going to work out. That’s the advice that I would give myself if I could go back in time.

Brett Dupree

Thank you so much, W.T., for coming on my podcast. I very much enjoyed listening to your story on how the law of attraction wasn’t fitting you. Instead of just ditching it, you’re able to look into it and go underneath and notice what didn’t work and building the confidence and the acceptance that you need to be able to go out and do what you want and leave that job and to find a one that’s better and more fulfilling and fitting to you.

Brett Dupree

And then also to take that extra step into writing a story, because since the dawn of time, we have taught are lessons in our history through stories. So, it’s just an amazing way to connect with people. So, thank you so much for coming on my podcast and thank you so much for what you do for this world.

WT Hamilton

And I want to thank you for having me on your podcast. I really enjoyed it and I really loved your questions. Got me thinking on the spot. And it was it was great to be able to share in this way.

Brett Dupree

May your day be special.

Joyous Expansion Podcast – Episode 8: Aimee Chandler – Ditch That All or Nothing Attitude

Joyous Expansion Podcast

Aimee Chandler

Aimee Chandler, the founder of Aimee Chandler Wellness, is a wellness coach focused on helping busy women create healthier lifestyles without making huge changes. Aimee works women who have had a major life event like a career, having children or a medical diagnosis that has thrown them off course when it comes to their health and wellness. By showing them simple steps in the areas of their nutrition, exercise, and mindset, she helps her clients discover how to create habits that lead to healthier, happier and leaner versions of themselves. Her master’s degree in Exercise Science and 30 years of experience in wellness have made her an expert, but her own personal transformation 3 years ago shows that her strategies work for any woman 40+ that wants to take back control of their health.

Aimee works with clients both live and virtually, one to one and in groups.
When you decide to take back control of your health and wellness, Aimee can be found at www.aimeechandler.com
Want an easy to use Wellness with Ease Blueprint that provides meal planning options and 2 portable workouts to get you started? Use this link…bit.ly/aimeecwellnessblueprint

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