Continue reading »]]> Here is an article that I wrote six months ago. This article fits really well with my Law of Attraction series. This article is about the beginnings of my career as a spiritual life coach. Spiritual Life coaching has changed my life for the better. Thinking big is a wonderful example on how changing my focus on what I desire has changed my perspective. I went from having almost no ideas on how to grow my business to having many ideas. I hope you enjoy my article.

Spiritual Life Coach Brett Dupree Presents: Learn from my mistake and Think BIG

While reading Michele Pariza Wacek’s article 3 Simple Steps to Taking a Quantum Leap in Your Biz, about how to grow your business fast, I had a realization. When I read the first point, “think big” it dawned on me that when it came to my coaching business not only was I not thinking big and going the slow route, I was planning on struggling.

In my research before I decided to become a life coach, I read that there were two different types of coaches, business coaches and life coaches. If I wanted to make money, I would have to be a business coach because they could earn over $1000 an hour. As a life coach, I would be doing well if I earned $150 an hour and would probably top off at $40000 a year.
I did end up making the decision to go for it and become a life coach, however I did not jump in all the way. This is not surprising, because in my current career I was making as much as I was planning on making when I reached the wage ceiling of life coaching. I felt that life coaching was my calling; however the fire was not there no matter how much I told myself it was. The amazing part is not only did I struggle to create my business; I struggled beyond my imagined struggle. Clients who I thought would work with me, did not want to work with me. I would sign up family members to build my experience and they would not want to continue after the first session. I was flabbergasted as to why I was struggling so much.

As I read Wacek’s article it dawned on me that I was struggling because I planned to struggle. Not only that, I am such a powerful creator that I created more struggle then I ever imagined. I asked for and received a struggling life coaching business. Even if by the grace of God Oprah gave me a magical referral and I became rich and famous, with my current belief system I would eventually bring myself back down to the $40000 a year struggling life coaching business.

Well no longer. It is time for me to start dreaming big. I am going to be putting all the Law of Attraction lessons I have learned towards my business. I can feel the energy shifting for me righ

t now as I now imagine myself living a very comfortable life as a six-figure coach

Thinking big is already getting me:

1. More room to grow my business. Before when I imagined a struggling coaching business the feeling and thought behind the business was confining. The choices of actions to take to grow the business seemed to be so important because there was only so much I could handle. By thinking big the thought of my business is expanding. A $40000 a year coach only does so much; a successful six-figure coach can do anything.

   

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2. To follow up on opportunities. Being a small time coach meant that the opportunity would just lead to being a small time coach. The excitement to follow up just was not there. Now I am following up on many more opportunities and actively pursuing clients. I am going to get my hours and get my certification with the ICF because that is a stepping stone to something great.
3. To notice more opportunities. Thinking small programs my brain to think small. My unconscious mind would not notice when opportunity was knocking at my door. I now allow opportunities to come on in.To accept success. Thinking like a $40000 a year coach would only allow me to accept being a $40000 a year coach. Chances are it would allow me to be an $8000a year coach wishing to be a $40000 a year coach.
4. More ideas then I have ever imagined. I have had more ideas to grow my business in the last two months than I have had in the previous two years.
5. To know that failure is not such a big deal. When thinking small each failure was huge, because so much hinged on each idea. When thinking big, each failure is just a stepping stone and allows me to learn what does not work or how to make it work. I am putting the saying, “Sometimes you win, sometimes you learn,” to work.

If you are in a similar position, I invite you to take this leap with me. Think big and notice what shifts inside of you. Imagine your business as more successful than you imagined it to be yesterday and notice what that does for you. You will gain amazing insights into the growth of your business. You and I both will be looking back a year from today surprised at how much has changed.

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Continue reading »]]> The Law of Attraction has many amazing aspects that work well with living in your daily life. In my path as a spiritual life coach, I use many of them every day. I work to deepen them and learn the lessons that come from them. The Law of Attraction is not only a good law to manifest what you want, it is also a good way to learn lessons on how to live your life. This is one of the blogs that discusses how I put the Law of Attraction into action in my daily life.

Spiritual Life Coach Tip on Law of Attraction: Listening to the Whispers

As mentioned in the previous blog on the Law of Attraction, the Law of Attraction is the most effective when you are living your life through inspiration. Living your life through inspiration means that you have let go of the resistance to what you desire, thus bringing your desire into your reality. What does it mean to live your life through inspiration?

Inspiration is when you are listening to that little voice in the back of your mind. It is the whisper of consciousness that you interpret. Generally you interpret the stream of consciousness through a voice, which is why I call it a whisper. This whisper is your higher self, source, the Universe, God, and even your subconscious communicating with you. The whisper is of a greater consciousness than you are experiencing on a daily basis. The whisper understands more about the world around you than you do consciously. When you listen to the whisper and do the actions of the whisper then you are acting on inspiration.

Train yourself to listen to the whispers.

To be able to listen to the whispers, you have to be in a state where you are of little resistance. This can be either without thought or full of positive thoughts. That is why when you meditate sometimes you get thoughts you would never have before. Another time is when you are about to sleep. You have probably noticed that sometimes when you are half asleep you get an amazing idea or solution to a problem you have been facing. Sometimes the message comes when you are asleep and then when you wake up, you notice that you have had this amazing idea.

The message does not have to come when you are asleep. The more you are feeling joyful and thinking positive thoughts the more times you will experience listening to the whispers. Soon the whispers will be a stream of consciousness that you listen to all of the time.

Joyful Transition

Sometimes when you are done with your current position in life you can hear the whispers starting. You may be done with your current vocation or relationship. Sometimes there is a lesson for you to learn. For me it was letting go. This is when listening to the whispers allows for a joyful transition. The whispers will come when you are stagnate and when it is time to expand beyond who you currently believe you to be. When the whispers first occur they will be subtle. The more you ignore the whispers the louder they will become. They will get louder until you are feeling the serious discord between who you are and who you know yourself to be.
Training yourself to listen to the whispers will allow you to go through a joyful transition as you are always becoming what you have already grown into.

What has been your loudest whisper?

Continue reading »]]> The Law of Attraction has many amazing aspects that work well with living in your daily life. In my path as a spiritual life coach, I use many of them every day. I work to deepen them and learn the lessons that come from them. The Law of Attraction is not only a good law to manifest what you want, it is also a good way to learn lessons on how to live your life. This is one of the blogs that discusses how I put the Law of Attraction into action in my daily life.

Spiritual Life Coach Tip on Law of Attraction: Learning to Let Go

If there has ever been a principle of the Law of Attraction that has been beaten in my brain repeatedly it is letting go. Letting go of my desires has been kind of difficult. The main reason it is hard is because I want my desires to actually happen. I have many hopes and dreams that I want to manifest into my reality. Yet the more I held onto my hopes and dreams, the less chance they would manifest.

I have been getting a lot of synchronistic, coincidence in time, events that constantly would tell me that I needed to learn to let go. I would be driving in the city looking for a parking spot. Right when I gave up and let go of my desire for a free parking spot or a parking spot in that area, someone would come out to the car in the parking spot right in front of me. It was so uncanny. It started with parking spots, and then it happened with money. When I gave up on the money I needed being there, I got 5 messages about sources of income, including one that is going to provide a stable one. It is honestly amazing me how much the Universe wants me to learn letting go at this moment in time.

The reason why letting go is so important because when you do not let go you put much focus on what you do not have and too much energy into trying to get what you desire.

<h2>Not here yet</h2>
By holding on to my desire so strongly, I was putting an emphasis on the fact that I did not have what I desired. When the focus was on wanting the desire to happen, I would attract myself to situations and events that were me wanting the desire to happen. The desire would never actually get to me because I would keep on attracting wanting the desire to happen. I was getting exactly what I had my focus on; the desire being there and me not having it. This led to negative emotions and thoughts which are the resistance to having what I wanted to manifest into my reality. The harder I held on to my desires the more resistance I created. Letting go of my desire would allow me to feel more positive emotions, thus removing the resistance to what I desire.

<h2>Too much energy on desire</h2>

I was putting too much energy into trying to get what I wanted. I would act based on the negative emotions that I was feeling. Working this way took a lot of energy. It was like I was peddling my canoe upstream. The more energy I would put into getting my desires, the more tired I became. This would make me feel tired and I would forget about the excitement I have on my desires. Nothing allows me to manifest my desires faster than having excitement for them. Losing the excitement would cause negative emotion, thus giving me resistance to my desires.

<h2>Let go and trust</h2>

Trusting that a desire will happen when the desire isn’t happening can be a struggle. It is just so easy to focus on the fact that the desire hasn’t happened yet. That is just lazy thinking. I do not want to take the easy way out. Focusing on what I want and knowing that I already have it takes some time and effort. Doing it is worth it. Letting go and trusting that the actions I am taking when I am inspired will move me closer to my desires allows me to not use too much energy when I do act. This is like I am peddling downstream. An example of this is blogging. During my early days of blogging for my business, I was peddling upstream. Each blog took over two hours to write and I would feel spent when the post was finally complete. I would post them and put a lot of energy wishing they would drive traffic to my site. When that didn’t happen, I would be crushed and my energy for writing blogs wavered. When I started to blog downstream, the joy of blogging and building relationships with amazing people like you, became the reason I blogged. Now I am writing blogs in 30 minutesand I am having fun. I can write multiple blogs on the same day. Also, at the beginning, I thought I would run out of ideas. Now I have more ideas than I do time to write them. I am enjoying the process of blogging now. I trust that my blogs will move me to the next step for my desires towards my business in ways that I hope and in ways that I cannot even imagine.

Trusting in yourself and the Law of Attraction is the best way to let go. Just let go and trust that you are receiving the right inspiration.
What do you need to let go of in order to manifest your desires?

Continue reading »]]> The Law of Attraction has many amazing aspects that work well with living in your daily life. In my path as a spiritual life coach, I use many of them every day. I work to deepen

them and learn the lessons that come from them. The Law of Attraction is not only a good law to manifest what you want, it is also a good way to learn lessons on how to live your life. This is one of the blogs that discusses how I put the Law of Attraction into action in my daily life.

Spiritual Life Coach Tip on Law of Attraction: Loving the Events

that Happen

As discussed in my post on the Eight Keys for a Joyous Life Moving From Joy to Joy, there is a Law of Attraction principle about liking the events that happen in your life. Adopting the principles of the Law of Attraction has given me a different perspective about the what has happened in my life. Every event that happens in my life has happened. Some of them I do like and some of them I do not like. I will always have preference because I will always have some kind of ego. I cannot control the world around me; however I can control what they mean to me. No matter what happens, everything goes through a filter in my brain. That is why I can look at a situation in a completely different way than someone else who sees the exact situation. The Law of Attraction has done wonders with the idea that the things I do not want to happen spawn the desires for what I do want to happen.

The Law of Attraction is about noticing what you want and then removing the resistance to it. Resistance is negative thoughts and emotion. If you want something and you think about how you cannot get it and have negative emotions when you even think about what you want, then there is little chance that you are going to get it.

The beauty of the events that I do not like is that they show me what I do want. No matter what happens in my life there is always going to be an event that I do not like. When an event happens that I dislike, there is another event that happens in my mind. I create a desire for something that I do want. Without having events I do not want happening new desires would almost never be created. Without new desires there is stagnation. Stagnation is something I do not like, so even without living a life without events that I do not like happening, I would be lead to an event of something I do not like.

Using that principle of the Law of Attraction I am able to look at my life with a new perspective. The events that happen in my life that I do not like actually create more desires for what I do want. Then I work on removing the negative emotion from that event and I manifest what I do want. The more undesirable events that happen, the more negative emotions I clear up and the more I manifest. The more I manifest, the more I expand. Since I work with expanding through joy, I go through a constant joyous expansion. Therefore, with this perspective, I am able to enjoy the events that I do not like because they are essential to my joyous expansion.

Finally, I am able to love the events that happen in my life.

The journey is half the fun, together we’ll nab it. Just reach out and grab it.

-Kermit the Frog and Fozzie the Bear

How have events that you do not like caused

you to grow as a human being in an amazing way?

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Continue reading »]]> Here is a joy meditation I made. It is a rough draft, however it will give you an idea of what is going to be on my future CD. Tell me what you think!

joy meditation

I really enjoyed making the meditation. I felt so good while doing it.

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Continue reading »]]> While studying to be a life coach I have discovered a few ideas that I do not agree with. The idea that forgiveness is not a good thing and that unconditional love is dangerous. I posted a couple of videos on You Tube with my thoughts on forgiveness and unconditional love.

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Continue reading »]]> In the last week of January a majority of Americans either quit or start losing motivation to fulfilling their New Year’s resolutions. When a New Year arrives, people love to make statements how this year is going to be different. This year is going to be the good one. Good bye 2009. Hello 2010! It is a new beginning where they will become a new person who reaches their goals.

Unfortunately, many people end up making the same resolutions each year. Every year they are going to lose weight, get a new job, join a gym, eat healthier, go out more, make more friends and the many other resolutions people make to change their lives.

Fortunately for you, you are not going to be one of them. You are doing something different this year. One of my favorite quotes is from Albert Einstein, “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results.” So what are you doing to do different this year to make your dreams come true?

Here are some suggestions

1. Write down your goals: Writing down goals increases the chances that they will become reality. To help alleviate any overwhelming feelings, write down smaller goals for your New Year resolutions. Smaller monthly goals are easier to accomplish. They are great for getting you back on track every month. Be sure to celebrate your wins.
2. Get an Accountabilibuddy: Find a friend that will hold you accountable. Make sure this friend is willing to call you on your excuses. Be willing to be able to accept it when they are being a little hard on you if you decide to slack. Also share in each other victories.
3. Take a class: You can find classes at your local schools that can help you reach your goals. One of the ways I made sure I was going to change one year was by taking three classes a month. I took a dance class once every two weeks, went to a group at www.meetup.com and then I would find a random class at an alternative school or community college. I was a shy man and taking a dance class was a fun way to grow as a person
4. Join or create a group: Like with the Accountabilibuddy, there is a certain power in belonging to a group. Surrounding yourself with people who have similar goals is a great way to keep yourself on track. www.meetup.com is a great way to find groups of people who are committed to create change in their lives.
5. Join an intention circle: Writing intentions in a group is a great way to create what you want in your new life with lasting change. It captures the power of people joining with the power of intentions. http://www.intenders.com/ is a great place to find what an intention circle is, how to start one and where to find one. It helps to write out your intentions with joy. Watch for my book coming in 2010 that will teach you how to write intentions in a joyful manifesting way.
6. Go to a workshop: Workshops are a great way to energize yourself and learn tools to create the life you want in a short period of time. The workshops I have taken have been a great help to me. Remember to take responsibility for your life and not spend more than you have on workshops as the workshop high can be very addicting. Read my blog on being your own guru. Remember that you are doing all of the work and they are just showing you a way.
7. Do some resistance breaking services: Resistance is inside of our psyche or energy and it gets in our way of moving towards what we want. NLP, EFT, therapy, and the Work are great resistance breaking training. NLP is good for programming the mind to get what you want. I even used some of the feelings generated in the workshops in my NLP feeling spinning work. EFT works on the energy body and is surprisingly simple, easy and effective. It helped me break through the resistance I had to deserving. I went from not liking hugs to a hug loving fool. Therapy is a good way to heal the past wounds of the mind. I haven’t done therapy, however I have heard good things from people who have. The Work is a wonderful training for the brain to allow you to give up a part of your story that you feel is holding you back.
8. Hire a professional: Personal trainers are great ways to keep motivated and learn how to work out. Life coaches are amazing at helping you reach your goals and keeping you on track. They will celebrate your wins, challenge you to grow, help you uncover the resistance you have to where you want to go, and be a catalyst to help create amazing change in your life.

Those are just eight suggestions that will make sure you will have the greatest 2010 ever! There are many other ways to do so. If you know one, make a comment. Also comment on what you are going to do differently this year to make your 2010 the best 2010 ever.

I have faith in you! You are going to have a great 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2015, …

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Continue reading »]]>

Last year, I chose the 2009 Placebo of the Year award. Congratulations to the winner Invite Change. I thought it would be fun to start 2010 with a look back at the top 15 placebos of the 2000s. Wow, it is funny to write that. I remember when I was going to party like it was 1999. That song did not get old at all in 1999.

Placebos in this sense are personal development work, events, books or audio-books that have changed my life for the better. The 15 that I mention here are the top 15 in the last 10 years that have greatly shaped who I am today.

Here are numbers 5 through 1.

Number 5: David Deida and his book Way of the Superior Man. The book Way of the Superior Man is about being a more superior man than the man you are now. It is about living your purpose fully and with complete abandonment of things that do not serve your purpose. It says that living your purpose as a way to serve everyone.

One of the main gifts I gained from reading Way of the Superior Man is his ideas on relationships. I learned about the three stages of relationships and noticed that I was in the second stage, because I didn’t want to be in the first stage. The first stage is a dominant macho jerk and submissive housewife. The second stage is a partnership between the new age wimp and the powerful woman. He talks about ways of being a powerful man without being a macho jerk. In terms of math, I think the first stage is 1+1=0, where both people are dependent of each other; however, they mostly cancel each other out. The second stage is 1+1=2, where both people are 50/50 partners. This is nice, however it doesn’t provide spark in the bedroom and the woman doesn’t get to explore her radiance because she has to pick up the slack from her man. Also, the man does not get to explore his direction and purpose as he has to be the man in the relationship and his woman’s best girlfriend. The third stage is 1+1=infinite, where they are both whole, healthy human beings and together they are so much more. In this scenario the man is living in service of his woman so she can get to the depth of her radiance and the woman is in service of her man so he can get to the depth of his purpose.

He also mentions that one of the mistakes men make is to treat women like they are men, and vice versa. The way he explained how women are spoke to me and from there I let go of a lot of anger I had towards women. Before reading this book, I had anger towards women for not liking me. It was their fault that I was alone. They just couldn’t see what a catch I was. Also I thought of them as crazy. After reading this book, I became inspired to be a man who can attract an amazing woman and love her for who she is. I do not want to marry a dude, why would I want my woman to be like one.

Number 4: Invite Change. The Invite Change coaching model has five classes. I have been through four of them so far. The first one is Living Your Vision. In this class we work as a group to create vision and purpose statements that we are to use for our lives. It is an empowering exercise to develop a statement that when spoken feels like it talks about the essence of who I am. My purpose statement started off as long, however now it is “to be joy and love deeply.” Saying it feels so great. This was a very special class that I recommend all people take, as you do not have to be in the coaching school to take this class.

The second class is Essentials. In this class students get the essentials of coaching. This class is a great starting point for learning how to coach and what coaching is. This is mostly a learning class with some good exercises.

The third class is Power. Power is an amazing class that I cannot really explain. I went into the class feeling pretty good about coaching and I left the class feeling amazing about coaching. I felt completely sure that I am a great coach and I can help people reach their goals faster and with more joy.

The fourth class is Dynamics. They say that what Living Your Vision is to your life Dynamics is to your coaching business. It felt very true. I just took this class two weeks ago so much of what I learned is sinking in. I am very excited to see where my business goes from here. The vision and my mission statement fills me with pride. I look forward to working with people and facilitating a change in them that will spread out into their communities. I will be a positive force for change in this world and a huge part of that is because of Dynamics.

The fifth class is called Mastery, which I will take in July.

Number 3: Intentions. Learning about intentions and writing them down has been an amazing way to grow. I first learned about intentions from Wayne Dyer. I started writing them in a meet-up group called an intention circle. I highly recommend checking out an intention circle in your area. Getting together to make intentions for how you want to direct your life is very powerful. I have also enjoyed the work of Lynn McTaggart and went to one of her seminars this year. There is a lot of power in the written and spoken word. Using them to our advantage will help us get to where we want to go.

I am so inspired by my work with intentions that my first book will be about writing joyful intentions to awaken your true potential. Intentions are how I bring everything together. I learn from something and then I write down an intention to live and embody the way that I want to live. The intention process has changed my life for good and I am looking forward to sharing that with you in my new book.

Number 2: Kingpin. If this is the first blog you have read of mine, then this is probably a big surprise. However if you read the blog “The Greatest Day of My Life” then you understand why this movie is in the second spot in my top 15 countdown. The satori that I experienced from watching this movie has changed my life in so many ways. I know I wouldn’t be the man I am today and all of the other placebos that I have above would not have registered the way that they have. Taking complete responsibility for my life has been so freeing. It is amazing how amazing it is. It also shows me that the greatest wins can come from the least likely sources. Being open to anything allows me to get an amazing realization from a comedy about a bowler with one hand and a slutty woman taking an Amish guy to a bowling tournament in Vegas.

Number 1: Warrior Sage. Warrior Sage is number one on my list because I have received more from this group than any other in the last 10 years. I have completed four workshops with them including the Illumination Intensive (twice), Sex Passion and Enlightenment and Living Ecstasy.

The Illumination Intensive is one of my favorite things I have ever done for myself. I learned that the main person I learn from is me. The amount I have learned about me from these intensives is staggering. One of the most important is best described as “I am me.” I feel that everything I have learned afterward has been more authentic. I believe that I am a much more authentic and present person because of the Illumination Intensive. If you have a chance for an Enlightenment Intensive I highly recommend it. The Illumination Intensive is enough to put Warrior Sage at the top of my list.

Sex, Passion and Enlightenment was interesting to me. I do not know how much I got out of it. I did get my boundaries pushed a lot. I am very grateful for that. I do feel like I am a better man for going through with it. I just cannot pinpoint what exactly I got out of it or why it is a good seminar. I would recommend it to people who are in relationships or want a relationship.

Living Ecstasy was an amazing experience. Trusting my intuition is the reason I signed up for this seminar. During the first night of Sex, Passion and Enlightenment, I had the same dream three times. The dream was me at the end of Sex, Passion and Enlightenment with the feeling that I do not know what I got out of it and then me signing up for Living Ecstasy. So when it was the end of Sex, Passion and Enlightenment and I noticed I had that same exact feeling, I thought it was a good idea to follow the dream and sign up. Living Ecstasy set the stage for an amazing 2009 and was the end of my three seminars in four months. I went to Living Your Vision in October 2008, Inner Boundaries in November and Living Ecstasy in December. It was an amazing experience for me. During Living Ecstasy, I again pushed my boundaries and became more comfortable with myself. I was in a situation where I was able to get more in touch with my heart. In fact it was right after Living Ecstasy where I simplified my purpose statement from five sentences to just one short statement, “to be joy and love deeply.”

I also joined a men’s group from through Warrior Sage and with their help I was able to be challenged to push many of my boundaries. I also bought the book, Living Ecstasy by Satyen Raja, the man who founded Warrior Sage. It is a group I highly recommend joining. They are a huge reason I found the key to release myself from my prison of fear.

Congratulations to Warrior Sage for winning Placebo of the Decade from Joyous Expansion. I am very thankful to all the other placebos and the many that didn’t make the list. I am blessed to live at a time when there are so many special teachers available to me. Plus, I am in a situation where I am able to explore them rather than just worrying about what my next meal is. I appreciate the wonderful times we live in and I am looking forward to more placebos and being your placebo.

Look out for my book in 2010!!!!

Continue reading »]]> Last week I wrote part one of the illusion of being done based off of the quote, “Always Being and Always Becoming.”

The second quote is one of my favorite quotes of all time. I am constantly using at this point when I talk to myself.

“It is not that you must be free from fear. The moment you try to free yourself from fear, you create a resistance against fear. Resistance in any form doesn’t end fear. What is needed rather than running away or controlling or suppressing or any other resistance is understanding fear; that means watch it; learn about it; come directly into contact with it.”

-J. Krishnamurti

Every time I think about areas where I am afraid I think the first line of that quote, “It is not that I must be free from fear.” Soon after, I look at what I can learn from this situation and what I can do right at that moment to feel the fear and do it anyway.

When listening to the enlightened teacher Adyashati‘s CD “Life without Center,” I was able to expand on this idea. One of the audience members on “Life without Center” asked Adya the question, “When will the resistance end?” The answer Adyashanti gave the man expanded my thoughts on the idea of the quote. He said, “Never.”

By allowing this thought in, I realized I was waiting for resistance to be done in my life, before I choose positive actions. I was waiting until I was enlightened, had a certain skill, was a certain way, had the correct thinking or the right level of joy, lived in the perfect situation before I would feel, do, or have, something. An example of what I was waiting for was for things in my life to be easy. I have read so many books about how when I am in the flow then life is just simple and things just click. From this one passage I realized that I was waiting for the resistance of surrendering to who I really am and giving my gifts full out. Waiting for something to happen before I was living the way I wanted to live will just create a situation where I am waiting for something instead of living.. It is not that I must be free from fear, resistance, pain, sadness, resentment, anger, revenge, worry, or any other negative emotion. When I try to free myself, I create a resistance. When I created resistance, I moved my focus to the negative feeling that I resisted. When I focus on this negative feeling, I notice more areas of my life where the negative feeling exists. As I notice more areas of my life where these negative feelings exist, I gravitate towards them because they are my focuses. When I gravitating towards my focus , I am then experiencing more and more situations where I want to free myself from this fear. Thus, I am creating an endless cycle of noticing fears, trying to free myself from them, and then creating them for the rest of my life. All I did was waiting. I was living in the illusion that there will be a finish to the negative feelings in my life.

In many conversations I have had about negative emotions those I am talking with have a desire to be free from them. They never want to feel fear again. This is very popular in the spiritual and motivational circles that I attend. When people live to remove the negative emotions from their lives, they set themselves up for disappointment and create a fake Pollyanna attitude of positivity.

When a person has the illusion that they are done with their negative feelings, they have an excuse to punish themselves when those feelings return, . They can now think the thought, “I thought I was over this, what is wrong with me?” They do this as they have a fake smile on their face telling the world that nothing is wrong. The truth is there is nothing wrong with them. Thoughts are kept in the brain and emotions are remembered. Triggers will happen in the future. Not being free from the triggers in the brain is not important, it is having the tools and the knowledge of what to do when these life occurrences happen that will lead to a wonderful life. What is important is having the ability to notice them, learn about them, come into direct contact with them and then turn them into art. In his book, Living Ecstasy, Satyan Raja writes about the negative happenings in your life and calls them your kinks. When you have these kinks, using them is your biggest gift. Take what you desire or feel is missing from your life from these kinks and give them away to other people.

For example, due to choices of people and myself in my life, one of my kinks is a fear of abandonment. I have spent many years trying to eliminate my fear and escape from its prison . Knowing that I’ll never be done doing this is a sense of relief because now I don’t have to beat myself up over it. . I would think, “I should be done with this fear.”, “When will I be done with this fear?”, or “how much work do I have to do to finally be done with this fear?”

Giving up the illusion of being done with my fear of abandonment allows me to learn from it. I take the desires from that fear and give the desires that are created out of those fears to others, making it my art. The desire I have that no one feel that they need something outside of themselves to be happy and learning more ways to deepen the love I feel are ways that I have taken this fear and turned it into my art. This blog you are reading and my entire coaching practice is an example of me taking my fear of abandonment and turning them into something wonderful that helps many people.

Giving up the illusion of being done also means it is time to stop waiting. Stop waiting for something to happen to give your gift to the world. Stop waiting for something to happen for you to be happy. Stop waiting for something to happen for you to live your dream. It is time to stop. The resistance will not be over, the fear will not go away, other people will not change, the government won’t change, and the economy will never be good enough for you to do what you want to do. There is always a good excuse for mediocrity.

Stop waiting and do what you want to do right now. For the sake of the people around you and for the sake of the world, stop.

My services

Now is the time to stop waiting. Working together, we will find the areas in your life where you are waiting for something and get you to stop. You will reach your goals faster and live a much better life. We will also find the gifts that you have hiding from your kinks and find new ways to look at this wonderful world where we live.

Homework of the Week.

1. Find something in your life where you are waiting for something to happen before you begin. Find what you can do this week to begin and do it.
2. Think of something that happened in your life that you believe still bothers you and keeps you from where you want to go. Notice what you need to happen for you to be over this or what feeling you need to be over it. Think of someone who needs the same and give it to them.

Continue reading »]]> The first three keys of living a joyful life, “Finding Your Placebo,” “Be Positively Selfish” and “Receive Abundance” may at first seem to be living a life where a person is just taking. The keys to living a joyful life are meant to be lived together and build on each other. The first three keys are very important to the fourth key and without the fourth key the first three would not have such a positive impact on our lives.

The fourth key to living a joyful life is to clarify and live your purpose.

Your purpose is a reason for being. When you are living your purpose you are living in a way that is inspired by the best parts of you. What you are doing is bringing great joy in your life. It is taking the gifts that you have and expressing them in the world.

Finding your purpose

Having a purpose fills people with a sense of meaning in their lives. Living a life without purpose feels empty.

It does not have to be challenging though. If a person feels they do not know their purpose, making it their purpose at this moment to find their purpose is more than enough. In fact, making the intention to find their purpose is enough to set everything that is needed for finding it in motion.

There are many books for finding one’s purpose or passion. The book that I read was The Way of the Superior Man by David Deida. Deida has a simple exercise that has you spend all of your free time doing absolutely nothing. Unless it is something that you need to do to survive you sit and do nothing. When there is something that you must do and makes it so you cannot sit anymore, you have found your purpose.

Making a Purpose Statement

Finding my purpose and putting it into a purpose statement was one of the best experiences of my life. Looking at a few words and feeling them click was very rewarding. My purpose is to be joy and to love deeply. When I say the words, “my purpose is to be joy and love deeply,” I am filled with excitement. As I work every day, I work to live every moment following my purpose statement.

The purpose statement is a representation of what I feel with my inner being. It is also something that changes. The truth of who I am is something that is beyond words, however, I am a person of words and words are how I talk to myself. So I use words to best communicate with myself to create the feeling of purpose and joy.

To find your own purpose statement, look at the words that best represent you. What do you love to do? How do you feel when you are doing what you love? When do you feel the most alive? What actions are you doing when you feel this way?

Invite Change has a powerful coarse called Living Your Vision. In this course people are given exercises that help them develop a vision and purpose statement. Seeing people create a purpose statement is an amazing event to witness. They talk about how special it is to have a sentence that they can say to themselves and it feels like their authentic self. They are able to know themselves more and their direction more. With the vision and purpose statement they are able to craft the rest of their lives with integrity.

Actions are the expression of purpose

In discussions I have had with many people, many have mistaken their job for their purpose. This is far from the case. If the job was their purpose and they were fired, then they would be purposeless. A person’s actual purpose is something that can never be taken away. A person’s actions are not their actual purpose. Instead, it is how they express their purpose. Living your purpose is making your life into an art.

Mistaking your vocation for your purpose is mistaking the role for who your self. Right now, I am a life coach who is writing a blog. This blog is how I am sharing my gift while living my purpose in this world. It is how I am expressing my purpose at this moment in time. Five years from now I could be expressing my purpose exactly the same or in a completely different way. If I am living my purpose being joy and loving deeply as a massage therapist, waiter or a motivational speaker appearing on Oprah, my purpose hasn’t changed. Only the expression of my purpose has changed.

Serve

The key to living your purpose is to live a life of service. Living a life of service is how you live your life with the most joy possible. When you give others your gift, you receive much in return. Living a life on your purpose is the best way for you to serve humanity.

Find your placebo, because when you are at your happiest it is easier to serve. Finding your purpose will be easier and living it will be as easy as dropping the oars and letting the current take you down the river.

Being positively selfish allows you to be at your best to best serve. As you are taking care of yourself and your well being you are able to serve from your purpose. You are not letting any situation take you off your path. You are living an inspired life for the sake of all beings.

Receive abundance because the more you receive the more you can give. The more you give, the more you receive. The more you allow into your life, the more you will be able to express your purpose and make art out of your life. Even though it might not seem spiritual or right, it also includes money. The more money you have the more you can serve the world around you.

My Services

Being a support to help you express your purpose is my purpose at this moment in time. It will bring me great joy to help you move out of your own way so you can live in the flow. Together we will increase the joy in your life so you can increase your capacity to serve and make a living out of living your purpose. Together we will squash your limiting beliefs and bring to light any invisible roadblocks that are getting in the way of you living as the best you, you can be.

Joyous Expansion

Homework of the Week

Do something nice for someone just for the fun of it.

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