Key #2 of a Joyful Life: Be Positively Selfish

Being selfish is one of my favorite keys to tell people. This key is very important to living a life full of joy. It is also something that our society tends to give bad rap.

The Joyous Expansion Key #2 of living a joyful life is “be positively selfish.”

Being selfish is generally frowned upon in our society. I have had many conversations with people who tell me, “I can’t do that. It is selfish.” Feeling selfish makes people feel bad about themselves, when they should feel good. Being selfish is taking care of you first.

You have to take care of yourself first because you will be able to give more to others. If you are sick, sad, or generally feeling bad, you cannot serve others in the best way possible. Sacrificing your own joy for someone else will not help anyone. This is how you live exactly opposite of the martyr mentality.

Won’t people be mad at me?

If you teach people that you are willing to sacrifice your well being for them, there is a good chance that people will be upset at you for being positively selfish. As long as you are being positively selfish for the greater good, they will eventually understand. If they do not, there is a chance that they are self-centered and nothing you can do will make them happy. Even when you are sacrificing yourself for them, you can never do enough. No matter what you do, these people will not be happy with you. You might as well be happy with yourself.

Taking care of yourself first is for the greater good

Airplane air mask instructions always mention to first put the mask on yourself and then on your child. If you do not do this it will cause both you and your child problems as you might pass out while you are trying to save your child. Thus dooming you both! These instructions make sense in everyday life as much as they do on a plane. A lot of people tend to sacrifice their own needs and slowly kill themselves for other people.

I like modify the definition of selfish to “taking care of myself so I can be there fully to serve others with all of the joy in my heart” so it is more accurate. I use the term self-centered to mean, “taking care of myself and only myself for just myself.” As long as you are living a life full of service and love, being selfish is an amazingly positive action. As you recharge your batteries you can go full out in your service. If you stretch yourself thin, you will not be there for the people you care about.

A positively selfish boss is a boss who has time to listen to their employees and be fair and just. A positively selfish parent will set a good example as they will teach their children that their needs are important. The positively selfish parent will also be more patient with their children and an overall better parent. A positively selfish friend can be there for their friends. A positively selfish lover can truly satisfy their partner.

Being positively selfish will allow you to do the actions that bring you more joy. It gives you time to find your own placebo. From there you can be an amazing example of how to live and change the world. Mahatma Ghandi said, “Be the change you want to see in the world.” Real change comes from the inside and that means taking care of you. The more you become a happy and whole person the better you will be at bringing your gifts into the world The better example you will be for the world’s children. The better leader you will be for those that follow you. You will affect change one person at a time in an amazing and positive way. It all starts with you taking care of you.

This also means to love yourself. Be positively selfish when it comes to self love. The more you love yourself the more you are able to love other people and love them unconditionally. That literally means to love them with no conditions.

No better way to love yourself than to take care of yourself.

My services

Hiring a life coach is an example of being positively selfish. When we speak together, we will be talking about you and how you can become more successful and full of joy.. That time will be all about you. All the words that come out of my mouth will be ones that I believe will help you in a positive way. It will be like a spa for your successful muscles. Together we will find ways for you to be positively selfish, while balancing all of your other needs. We will get you to a point where you are happy and can serve the people in your life more fully.

Homework of the week

This week, do something only for you. I suggest getting a massage.

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Inspirational Life Coach Brett Dupree (266 Posts)

Internationally certified life coach through inviteCHANGE, Brett Dupree envisions a powerful future in which people live in pure joy. He believes that there is a great transformation just around the corner and he coaches people on how to use passion and inspiration to ride the powerful wave of awakening that is sweeping this world. Brett has dedicated his life to the study of personal empowerment. He believes that real lasting change comes from changing from the inside out. Working with you one-on-one, Brett helps you listen to your inner voice to reach your goals with passion, inspiration and ease . He creates a sacred space that allows you clients to bask in the joy of creation. He will help you find peace and balance in their lives so you can transform yourself into a self leader. Using the power of intentions, the Law of Attraction and his deep loving powerful heart he helps his clients gain miraculous results.


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    • Winnifred Prefontaine on February 3, 2010 at 2:15 pm

    Thats dope…

    • Craig K. Ray on February 14, 2010 at 11:12 am

    I don?t usually reply to posts but I will in this case. WoW

    • Rodrick Berrey on March 9, 2010 at 6:53 am

    Excellent post I must say.. Simple but yet entertaining and engaging.. Keep up the awesome work!

  1. A Life Coach is sometimes very necessary so that we do not loose our way in our lives.,’:

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    • Maria Howard on July 25, 2010 at 10:59 am

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  2. i had a mid-life crisis and what i needed was a life coach”*.

    • Seth Monrow on July 30, 2012 at 9:21 pm

    I don’t know if anyone around here needs help being selfish, including myself. Though we all want to look out for own interests before the interests of others, is that really a good idea? Does selfishness bring good to our lives and other people’s?

    Now, we in America love freedom- freedom to buy a big Mac, freedom to get a job at Wall-Mart (why I don’t know), we want freedom to have a nice house, freedom to get married and then divorce, and then marry again… With all of these freedoms, we can basically satisfy any desire we may have- We want it, we get it. .

    But here are some problems in America directly caused by our selfishness: legalizing prostitution, pornography, and drunkenness. And these three “Freedoms” have much to do with satisfying human desire. The man looking at his own interests says, “Yeah, I’m game for these things- I want to get drunk once in a while and easily indulge myself sexually” rather than posing the pivotal question, “Will these things bring harm to myself or others?”

    And as a result of a serious lack of self-restraint because we are free to do as we like, hidden pornographic addictions destroy hundreds if not thousands of marriages every year. Prostitution really screws with people’s marriages and it can easily ruin the prostitute’s life. Drunkenness kills tons of people!

    And so because of our promotion of selfishness in the USA and our our freedom to do as we like, we all suffer.

    Selfishness is bad.

  1. […] first three keys of living a joyful life, “Finding Your Placebo,” “Be Positively Selfish” and “Receive Abundance” may at first seem to be living a life where a person is just taking. […]

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